I just love it when somebody comes up with a better way to do something.

Check out this new way to make scrambled eggs.

[thanks, boing boing]

Two things you need to know about me: First, I have a crack team of scientists pushing the boundaries of space-time, desperately seeking ways for me to care less about football. Frankly, I doubt that it’s possible but they work cheap so I let them keep at it. Second, I hate TV ads. Manipulative little morality plays designed to prey on my deepest fears and secret desires. I believe that the TiVo people deserve a Nobel Prize for making it easy for me to watch TV without ads.

Having read that, you’ve probably guessed by now that I’m one of those wack jobs who loves superbowl ads.

Yup. Busted.

I could not name the two teams who played and have no idea who won, but the first thing I did when I sat down at my interweb kiosk this morning was to go looking for a web site that had all of the superbowl ads posted.

So yes, I pay TiVo so I can watch TV without the ads and I pay Adelphia so I can watch ads without the TV.

I’m a complicated guy.

So anyway,
Stunt City was the best (I love the little beat at the end when the coffee is too hot), but the Hummer ad and the Bud Light ad with the bear were also good.

There were a few dumb ones that had good punch lines. The FedEx ad and the Bud Light ad with
the revolving wall both made me laugh.

Most of them were pretty standard, but some companies might just as well have made a big bonfire with the money. Emerald Nuts… what the hell was that?
The Blockbuster ad reeked of desparation and actually made me feel sad for them (quite a feat, considering how much I hate that company). Finally, Ford using Kermit to sell a car? That’s just freaking evil.

There are also a bunch of GoDaddy ads that never ran on TV, but the less said about them the better. “Remember when we did that funny thing five years ago? That was cool.” We get it; Your product is a commodity so you’re trying to sell it with sex but those repressed starched shirts just won’t let you. You’re rebels. Next.

The Student Doctor Forum has a great thread, titled Things I Learn From My Patients. It’s a collection of those heartwarming, life affirming lessons that can only come from seeing people experience the purest moments of their lives. We’re lucky to be able to look over these young doctors’ shoulders as they learn what it means to heal.

Some of my favorites:

never leave your last refill of percocet in plain site after your docs office closes if one of these 3 friends is coming over for dinner:

1. some dude
2. my friend
3. that bitch

---

Latex paint, despite being thick and creamy, does not coat your stomach and provide the same relief as pepto bismol.

---

Drinking Pine Sol diluted in a 5 gallon bucket, shared with 5 friends, is not a good way to get drunk.

---

If you are going to get into a fight, and have a prosthetic eye, make sure you take it out first…..and, for safe keeping, shove it up your vagina…..the, realize that you cannot get it out and go to the ED for removal

---

No matter how annoyed you are at being incarcerated dont slash open your scrotum and shove razor blades up your urethra.

Ok, now I make up a lot of silly stuff on this site but to the best of my knowledge THIS IS TRUE. RollCall is a legitimate newspaper, owned by The Economist, that focuses on Congress. I used to subscribe, and I trust them.

(emphasis mine)

Election Update: Do-Over on First Ballot

By Ben Pershing
Roll Call Staff

Thursday, Feb. 2

House Republicans are taking a mulligan on the first ballot for Majority Leader. The first count showed more votes cast than Republicans present at the Conference meeting.

Ouch.

Election Update: Do-Over on First Ballot

[via Fark]

If they had included more ice skating.

Wow. People suck.