I love this. A guy shows people goatse, and then posts pictures of their reactions on Flickr. You need to be logged in to Flickr to see them.

That’s just cruel. I’d feel awful if it wasn’t so funny.

[Thanks, Laughing Squid!]

Hunter Thompson said, “When the going gets wierd, the wierd turn pro“. Is even that enough to explain
these photos?

Lest we forget, this is the man claims to have been beaten up by Liza Minelli.

The architects have delivered their preliminary drawings, and Chris Doyle used his particular genius to construct a 3D model. Sadly the Corps of Engineers won’t give permission to dredge the river so they won’t be able to bring the big ships in to dock.

Ladies and gentlemen, I present The Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster.

Strangers With Candy was one of my favorite TV shows, and “Yes You Can’t” is the single funniest half hour ever recorded. (1) It’s funnier than The Spirit of Christmas, if you can believe such a thing is possible.

So why am I not excited by the news that the Strangers With Candy movie is coming out in June?

Sadly, the early reviews were pretty bad when it was on the film festival circuit looking for a distributor. That was more than a year ago. This review on IMDB is pretty weak, also. The reviewer describes it as a tamer version of the TV show.

I guess I’ll just stay home and reread Wigscape.

Ahh, who am I kidding. Brain Candy got awful reviews and we loved it. At Shaun of the Dead, Deana and I were the only people in the theater who laughed. I’m there opening day.

(1) Yes, I’ve seen Chuckles Bites The Dust. Meh. Furthermore, I don’t care what anybody says: I don’t love Lucy.

Honestly, I don’t know why I hear so many complaints about Wal-Mart. I love the place. Yeah, ok, you save four percent, big deal. That’s just the start.

The real draw for me is the show; the cast is just amazing. I love that “Tony and Tina’s Wedding” thing that they do, where you’re surrounded by actors pretending to be real people. The performances are incredible, and they’ve scripted wonderful, little morality plays to show you what life would be like if the people around you were replaced by monsters. You really believe that this woman is being cruel to those tiny children, that the workers blink “torture” in morse code, and that somebody would actually sell a gun to Travis Bickle over there.

Seriously, it’s uncanny. Thank god it’s not real. Stay in school, kids.

Anyway, check out How Wal-Mart Is Like Academia
by James Joyner. The parallels are pretty funny, and not just because they support my contempt for that through the looking glass world we call ‘The Academy’.

Because the academic market is so tight, universities have adopted virtually the same attitude toward aspiring professors as Wal-Mart does to prospective stockers. They demand heavy teaching loads, substantial committee work, a rigorous pace of professional publication — and offer rather paltry salaries. And that’s for people who have, on average, twenty-two or more years of schooling.

Vodkapundit has a great post about Google and China. I don’t agree with everything he’s got to say, but I’ll give him megadittoes on this one (that’s what you people say, right? “megadittoes”?).

I agreed with the article anyway, but what really made my morning was this:

I received an email yesterday about AOL’s history with Beijing. It was sent confidentially from someone who was in a position to know. I can give any details without getting permission from the sender first, but let me say this: Offered a deal like Google got, AOL refused. Good on them.

Wow, way to go us. Google’s new slogan should be, “Less Ethical Than AOL”. Got a nice ring to it. It’ll look great on a business card.

As always, when searching for the perfect quote, I refer to Talmud. Thus spake the Great Rabbis:

Bart: “Way to go, Dad, I feel….what’s the opposite of shame?”

Marge: “Pride?”

Bart: “No, not that far from shame.”

Homer: “Less shame?”

Bart: “Yeah.”

Genetic differences help explain cigarette addiction.

Two new studies of smokers have yielded new insight into a gene linked to cigarette addiction. The findings could lead to more personalised, and ultimately more effective, treatments that help people to quit smoking.

Both groups examined the numerous forms of a gene called CYP2A6, which codes for an enzyme that acts mostly in the liver and regulates nicotine metabolism in the body. Previous research revealed that people with an ineffective form of the gene are less likely to become addicted to smoking.

Experts think that nicotine levels remain elevated for longer in these individuals, delaying the craving for the next cigarette. Nicotine is the primary chemical responsible for smoking addiction.

[thanks, Fark, bock bock!]

Hello, Ms. Battisti? Yeah, hi, this the hospital calling. Fine thanks. You are? Great, great. Glad to hear it. Actually, that’s what I’m calling about. Yeah, remember how during the surgery we put a bone into your back? You do? Good, good. Funny story about that. Turns out it was kind of, uhh, stolen. No, ma’am, he was already dead when it happened. Thing is, though, he might have had syphilis. Or hepatitis. You do? Syphilis? Yes, ma’am, I imagine you would wonder about that.

Turns out that
patients nationwide may have received tissue stolen from cadavers.

Battisti was informed that the cadaver bone that was implanted in her back may have been infected with various viruses — the result of what investigators say was a large-scale scheme in which corpses were cut up and body parts illegally sold.

The Long Island woman now claims she contracted syphilis from the bone and plans to sue.

I’m glad that this site doesn’t have anything near us, because Deana would spend all day driving around to pick it all up.

GarbageScout.com – Found treasure map to New York City, a recycler’s dream, a cheapskate’s best friend, and a dumpster diver’s companion

Check out the ULTIMATE THEORY of what’s going on with Lost.

See, these scientists have learned how to control electromagnitism, so that they could cause… err, prevent (?) the reversal of the earth’s magnetic poles. They used their control of magnets to get just the right people onto the plane, and then stuck them in suspended animation until… well, I really shouldn’t ruin the surprise.